Hey... Yeah Laila he better get jail time. Thank you love

hmm weight 125.4, wow I am not complaining but I am getting concerned that losing this fast is going to gain it right back. I am not doing anything different either. But I like the weight going down.

my heart rate has been high again today... I had to walk to therapy and my heart rate got up to 198, I just wanted to sit down in the middle of the sidewalk. But I didnt. Earlier i figured out that I had had my hr monitor on for 2 hours 55 minutes and for 2 hours and 5 minutes my heart rate was in the above zone (above 124).
Heck I am sitting on the couch and my heart rate is around 110-115.
I am drinking a lot of water, I ate 4 spoons of applesauce and 2 almonds before walking to therapy. And when I got home I had a rice cake with pb and brown sugar splenda.

Therapy was alright... frustrating, confusing... she asked about my weight, I couldnt tell her I lost more than 6 pounds this week, so I said 3 pounds, she thinks I am 139. She thinks I had 2 days without binging last week. I wish it were true but I failed last week, bp'd everyday.

she said I need to think about what I want... I told her I want/need to lose about 15-18 more pounds (she thinks to 120). she said I cant. I will try to maintain at that weight. She said I wont be able to. But I can give myself permission to eat then. She said I will just binge. ugg

I dont know... I just know I need to lose

On the plus side my BMI is below 17.5 (barely though)

I am getting money from my friend today because I am going to work for her thursday. I am walking to the school (where she works) if the rain holds off.

Damn my butt has been hurting my couch sucks,
I am thinking about what to buy... I am trying to think logically...
bread, milk, lunchmeat, eggs
maybe pasta, potatoes, pizza,

ohh monday measurements:
Hip: 33.25 (34)
LR Hip: 30 (31)
Waist: 23.5
Breast: 29.5
Neck: 11.5
R Thigh: 17.5
L Thigh: 17
RU Arm: 8.5
LU Arm: 8.5 (8.75)
R Wrist: 5.25
L Wrist: 5.25
R Calf: 12
L Calf: 12

Not much change, 2 inches difference, weight loss since last monday: 6.4 lbs
I am gladly surprised.

ohh and I didnt get my period again... even on the pill.

hey...
weight 126.4

doing alright... been crocheting a bunch today... I really want to finish the shirt but as it gets warmer its harder to crochet because the thread gets sweaty from my fingers and it makes my stitches all tight. Its very frustrating

I ate a rice cake with a teaspoon of pb and brown sugar splenda

bp:
a box of lucky charms (makes water green lol, I didnt have any milk so I used water)
4 pieces of tilapia
3 packs of ramen
pre-purge 133.8, post purge 126.4 YAY morning weight!

alright tomorrow is monday... therapy...

the asshole the hurt Kayla was in the paper

hey...
weight 126.8
not bad...

been really exhausted today... my heart rate monitor getting its work. Just getting up and dressed this morning had my heart rate in the mid 180s, and just sitting on the couch my heart rate was 120, resting...  I had to walk to the store to pick up a medication. came back and sat outside (i have a reclining chair) and with my feet up my heart rate returned to normal, 80-85.

came back inside and coming up the stairs is hard, got my heart up to 190, blah

I was so hungry, I mixed a can of cream of potato soup (it said it expired sept. of 2010, but I still used it), a can of corn, a can of peas, and a can of sliced potatoes. I cooked 5 oz of chicken and added that. It turned out okay but I used up most of the rest of my food. Dont know what I am going to do tomorrow. I am going to get money from my friend monday and then work for her thursday.

Pre-purge 136.0, Post purge 128.0

I kinda like the book I started the other day, the one I wrote about but im like 3/4 the way through it now... I read for about 2. 1/2 hours last night, i kept say '1 more chapter, just 1 more'

I am taking my electric blanket off my bed tonight... last night I didnt have it on and I sweated nasty. It was so gross, i hate waking up dripping in sweat.

I guess thats it for tonight

uggg i feel so blah
I was kinda happy-ish with my weight but it only lasted for about 5 minutes but then it was gone
Weight 127.6
It was a big drop so it might not stay

I am tired and just blah... i bp'd it didnt help
i just want to sleep for a few days... till I can get some money... but you know what even if I had money for more food I dont think I would feel much better... I couldnt stop thinking about food last night... What I will buy when I get my money on the first. Not if I work for my friend this week because that is only $30 and should get basics like bread and milk or whatever

my bp:
3 bowls of cereal
8 pull and peel twizlers
1 ham sandwich
6 eggs (2 whole, 4 whites)
8 pieces bread
8 hot dogs
pre-purge 136.8, post purge 128.2

im laying in bed... i just want to sleep but i doubt i can fall asleep
i kinda want to read but not the book i just started

my legs and muscles are so tired... i have a headache uggg
alright thats it

<3 thanks Laila, glad the plateau is gone

hey, weight 129.0
awesome

not much going on today...
I did not sleep well last night... I hope I sleep better tonight

I had 2 bp's today
1:
3 ham sandwiches
3 turkey burgers
1 can of green beans
2 servings baby carrots
2:
2 servings of mashed potatoes with gravy
4 pieces of Mahi Mahi fish
3 packs of ramen
1 package of biscuits
pre-purge: 138.4 post purge: 129.8

im tired... i read for 2 hours last night, finished the book I was reading. Got a new one out, started it today I am not sure I am going to stick with it, I like the medical/suspense aspect but it also is based on astronauts and space stations

i guess i dont have much to say...

hey... weight 130.0

today I didnt do much... bp'd earlier... french fries, cereal and hot dogs, whats nasty is ive noticed whenever I have milk with cereal (for a binge) the milk like separates in my stomach, its nasty I get clumps of white stuff, like mushy cottage cheese. It is so gross... I have to stop eating cereal or drinking milk when I purge. just thinking about it as I am writing just grosses me out.

My after purge weight was 129.8! Holy cow, i couldnt believe it... I am rarely ever the same weight as my morning weight let alone below it! I hope after this binge I just finished I am still low... Tomorrow I will be in the 120s! YAY!!!

I just finished eating a big bowl of macaroni salad, it was alright well pretty good... I like potato salad more but I had some pasta and tuna, and put some celery and 4 hard boiled eggs

well i guess that is it... i dont have much to say today...

hey
weight 130.8 still down but not back to 130.0

today was alright... nothing outstanding or anything

had 2 bps today...
1=
a package of shrimp
6 servings of rice
butter/salt
2=
3 turkey burgers
8 slices of bread
(2 with butter)
a can of peas
2 boxes scalloped potatoes
1 bag of popcorn
1/2 pack of twizzlers pull and peel
Pre-purge 141.4, post purge 132.0

I stayed up a little last night reading... I love reading but sometimes it just makes my head hurt so bad. I really want to read again... the book i am reading is good but my eyes/head already hurt :( blahh

uggg weather is crap today... yesterday was too...

ohh i walked 3.15 miles yesterday... to therapy and the store and home.

alright i guess this is it for tonight...
<3