Hey my loves,
Sorry I havnt posted in a few days Laila, I was out of town.
I went and looked at the apartment. It was nothing like he was saying. I cant live there, its not safe.
Ive been making phone calls today trying to figure things out so i have a place to stay next month.
I am just so nervous and freaking out inside. I wish things were done.
Whenever something doesnt go as planned I freak out... I am questioning so much right now... the only thing that I have not questioned is do I want to live with Shannon. That much I know for sure.
Everything else... I feel is up in the air. I feel like I cant make a decision... but what about? I am not sure...
I am a fricken fat cow again, I gained yet again. 142 UGGGG I took a few laxies but not a lot of results...
I ate and purged once... I wish I could just NOT eat till I am back into the low 130's
I have a doctors appointment wednesday, they will weigh me, even if I object they will, They are going to see how fat I really am. Its bad that I know my weight, and I am disgusted by it but knowing my doctor and my therapist know it, uggg its horrible.
I HATE my body!
Love you ladies,
HUGZ
~Kristi
=^..^=
1 comment:
hey hun!!
i hope you get to move in with shannon. whenever you can :)
you know hun, we uasually worry about a lot of things, but almost nothing of things we worry about happens..so maybe we just have to live each day, one day at a time, and try not to worry so much..
Gaining is a bicth..i hate it so much..the metabolism is a crapthingy...wish it could be a lot nicer...
Try to take care of your self my love.
xxx
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