hey... weight 134.0 down from 135.2 yesterday... still gross though

went grocery shopping... i am so SCREWED financially I spent all my foodstamps and I have about $20 left in the bank. I havnt even sent several things I need to mail... one food swap thing to the uk and my mothers gift for mothers day.

I would REALLY like to go see my mom but how can I do that without money. ugggg a round trip ticket costs over $150.

I want to binge to get rid of the old foods that i cant keep in, but im not really hungry and i dont want to binge at the same time. I bought a bunch of good stuff grocery shopping... tried to plan things that i might be able to keep in. Things I might not be as prone to binge on.

my case worker started asking a lot of questions... she said I look very thin, she hoped I was not getting to where I was several years ago, I know what I need to be doing, Ive been in treatment several times, and even outpatient (for ed) is not going to help. I know what I am supposed to be doing.
I dont need ed treatment but just her saying that was pissing me off, people with eds can be in treatment for years and in and out of different treatment centers.  But because I have been IP in one place and in 4 partials (3 different ones). I should just be able to be 'normal'?

Whatever

the sun is shining today but its not even 50 degrees... uggg i want it WARM and SUNNY

okay maybe i am hungry... to binge or not? I think i want to ... and tomorrow I can plan a good day. I am going to work for my friend and i usually have dinner there. (I wish i was getting paid but she paid me last week for working this week)

BLAH I hate money problems!